Dear friend,

On a quiet foggy evening, I was sitting alone in a room feeling a little down. “How do I cheer myself,” I asked? 

First, I headed to the refrigerator. I wasn’t hungry, but that ice cream sure looked inviting. It bought me three minutes of happiness, but soon guilt followed. A quick 400 calories later, I was unhappy again. 

Next, I tried to forget myself watching a few funny videos. That worked for another four minutes. 

I then called a friend. A familiar voice mail greeted me. “Everyone is so busy these days,” I thought. I endured three voice mails in a row. 

Finally, I recalled a study I had recently reviewed. In this study, researchers invited a group of university students to keep track of their kind behaviors and log these actions for a week. (1) A control group spent their week as usual. Both groups were then assessed for change in their happiness.  

Results showed that students who logged their kindness became significantly happier, compared to the control group. 

Notice that the happier group didn’t do anything extra through the day except just remembering their kind actions. That’s all. Perhaps they felt worthy in the process; maybe they lived their week with greater compassion. 

I applied this study to my evening glum. I sat down and thought of the prized aisle seat I had given to an elderly gentleman a few days ago. I recalled my pro bono engagement earlier in the week, and the visitor I had helped with directions even though I was getting late for a meeting, and more. 

The relief was immediate. I felt worthy and happier. And this happy feeling lasted much longer continuing late into the evening.  

Happiness is a state of mind. Infuse your mind with gratitude and compassion – and you will trick it into a happier state. Sensory experiences appease the senses, but only for a few minutes. A rich source of lasting happiness is going the extra mile to help a fellow human being. 

You can make these moments count double by recalling them at a later date. Remembering your kind actions could inspire you to do more acts of kindness, putting you as some researchers say, in a nice upward spiral.

So, if you feel a little down today, count your previous acts of kindness. Savoring your kindness will help you be happier, and in the long-term, create a kinder world – just what our children need. Happy counting! 

Take care,

Amit